As long as you don't judge me too hard for them. My family always get so exasperated with me about it.
[She doesn't just sit around and look pretty. She starts cleaning up, fluttering about to help Jesse get everything ready for their s'mores. It's completely dark in the desert now save for their fire. The moon is bright, but only half full. It makes the stars twinkle even more all around it. She's buzzing a little from his soft kiss. She definitely wants more. She hasn't really been able to get him out of her head since their night together.
With the leftovers of the picnic basket tucked away in the fridge, the RV is left alone for now because the real party is by the fire pit. She wiggled in excitement as he gets all the goodies out. She spears a fluffy marshmallow with the stick and offers it to him before making another for herself. She roasts it over the fire and watched it slowly turn golden.]
I don't think I've ever had s'mores pop tarts. Are they any good?
Nah, no judgments here. This is, uh, a judgment-free zone. Totally.
[ Jesse smiles, but he means it even though it's said in a lighthearted tone. By the time he settles back by the fire, he finds himself getting a little lost looking up at the stars, like he does every time he's out here in the quiet and the dark. Most of the time he's out here by himself, save for the times he'd come out to work, but Alexis is the only person he's shown this place. He wants to let her into his life and share things that he doesn't share with anyone else. Eventually he'll be able to tell her more, but this at least lays the groundwork for that later conversation.
He takes the stick and holds it over the fire, trying to be careful not to ignite the marshmallow, even if he sometimes likes the charred ones. ]
Admittedly, I've only had 'em when I was super stoned so, like, they were really good but so is a lot of stuff when you're high. They weren't as good as the real thing, though.
[ He laughs and, distracted, ends up holding the marshmallow in one spot for too long. He does a double-take before realizing it's on fire. ]
Oh, shit!
[ Jesse pulls it from the flames and blows on it a few times until it's out. It's burnt, but only on the outside. He makes a s'more with it anyway, laughing at how easily he's distracted. ]
I guess gettin' em all golden brown is for people with a better attention span than mine.
I feel like I can tell you anything, and you won't judge me.
[She's happy for that. Jesse is so easygoing and laidback. She still marvels at how easily the conversation comes between them. Things just come out without needing much thought. She's slowly turning her marshmallow in the flame. She chuckles a little. She's been high on so many different things, and she's definitely been guilty of munching on a strawberry Pop-Tart during a time or two.]
I always wanted Doritos when I was high. I don't really like them in general, but I always craved them whenever it happened.
[She's not even all that particular on which flavor though she remembers getting the blue bag often. She startles a little when his marshmallow ignites. Her hands flutter helplessly as if she wants to help him but unsure how. She leans in to study it.]
Still looks good to me! If you want, you can have mine!
[She pulls out her gooey golden brown marshmallow and winks at him.]
[ Jesse says suddenly, but then laughs at his reaction, leaning over to get a chunk of chocolate and some graham crackers to hold the whole thing together. ]
I mean, nah. I'm good with this charred mess I created. Sometimes the burnt bit adds flavor as long as it's not, like, totally obliterated.
[ Jesse smiles, because he's been there--burned marshmallows beyond the salvage point. It's happened enough times for him to laugh about it. ]
But yeah...you can tell me anything. I mean, I know it takes time to earn that kinda trust, but...I won't let you down.
[ His expression grows a little more serious, wanting to convey that he means it. He doesn't expect any crazy confessions or anything, especially only on the second date, but he wants to let her know that he's going to work on earning her trust. ]
[She's giggling at his refusal. She reached for the chocolate and graham cracker too, so she can squish it all together in a delicious treat. It's hard to take a ladylike bite, so she just goes all in and hopes for the best. She has a smear of chocolate and marshmallow on her lips that she tries to lick up, a hand coming up to politely hide what a mess she is.]
I really like that about you. I feel like you just get me, you know? I really hope that I make you feel like that too.
[She gently bumps her shoulder against his and offers him a bite of her s'more. Alexis playfully steals a bite from his to get a taste of his charred creation.] I want you to know you can tell me anything too. I'm hard to freak out.
[ Jesse only laughs harder at Alexis' reaction to his refusal, watching as she takes a messy bite of her s'more, following suit. He actually makes sure he gets himself a little messy, too, just to make her feel better even though it's kind of hard to eat without making a mess. Chocolate on his face, he gestures. ]
You, uh...got a little something...
[ Jesse can't hold in his laugh, but he leans in to kiss her anyway, making a mess of them both. Luckily, he brought out a stack of napkins for them that he placed a rock on top of so they wouldn't blow away in case of wind. He wipes at his face and then offers Alexis a few napkins, too, a goofy grin stuck on that he couldn't quell if he tried. ]
Yeah, I feel like that too, for sure.
[ He thinks for a moment, taking a deep breath before he starts talking. ]
Okay, so um. The first time I came out here? It, uh. It wasn't to clear my head. The first time I came out here...I was out this way for um...drug manufacturing. Methamphetamine.
[ He rushes the next words, in an effort not to scare her off entirely with that first factoid. ]
I don't, like...I don't really smoke it anymore. Just, um. Sell it. Sometimes. I was kinda tryin' to get out of the game, actually...but this guy. My partner. He, uh. He blackmailed me into stayin' in and partnering up with him. He's kind of an asshole a lot of the time but like...he's sick. Lung cancer. I guess he needed a way to make some fast cash to, y'know, leave behind somethin' for his family before he bites the big one.
[ Jesse winces a little, not quite able to meet Alexis' eyes. It's a pretty huge confession, but he feels a weight lift off his shoulders when he admits it. She deserves to know a little of what she's getting into and if she wants nothing to do with him after this, well, he would understand even if he'd be heartbroken. ]
It doesn't feel right not tellin' you. I uh, I didn't wanna tell you when you were in a position where you couldn't just like, leave on your own if you wanted to but just like, say the words and I'll drive you back. No judgments, like I said...
[She giggles a little louder when he ends up just as messy as her. S'mores are messy in general, but she appreciates it. The kiss is even more welcome. Her free hand comes up to cup the back of his neck as she deepens it. They taste deliciously sweet together, and it makes her crave more. When she pulls back, she takes napkin from him to clean up. She knows she's got a silly smile on her face, but he draws it out of her so easily.
The smile slowly fades as she becomes more solemn. She fees the shift in the air. Jesse has her full attention. Whatever he has to tell her, it's serious.
Her brows knit together as he explains what he's been caught up in. It's not her first time to be involved with a drug dealer, but likely the first with a drug manufacturer. She feels an indignation on his behalf. Cancer or not, his partner sounds like a huge dick.]
He's blackmailing you? Who does he think he is? [Her tone is affronted. She has a bone to pick with his partner. It's not even a thought in her mind to have Jesse take her home.]
[ For some reason Jesse feels a distinct need to defend Mr. White. He has since the beginning. As much as the guy gets on his nerves from time to time, he's also definitely saved Jesse's life on more than one occasion, and had gotten them out of a tight bind even more times. He's not all bad, or maybe that's exactly the way he's been manipulated to feel. ]
I dunno. That's how he got me to agree to work with him at first but, like, I think it's different now. Honestly I probably wouldn't've helped him out otherwise. Guess he was just, like, desperate considering his health problems and all. We kinda....have an agreement goin' these days and, like, we work for someone else now.
[ Jesse doesn't know how much detail he can go into about that. Not because he doesn't trust Alexis, but because he worries about her knowing too much and if that would ever put her in any kind of danger. He'd never forgive himself if it did. ]
I'm not, like, planning to stay in the game much longer. He said, like, a few more months and we'll be set, so. I don't know. I know it's not the ideal situation but um...I felt like you deserve to know, so.
[ Jesse bites his lower lip and reaches out to take her hand, squeezing gently and looking into her eyes, trying to read her. ]
[She might only know Jesse briefly, but she can tell he's so loyal. When he feels connected to someone, he's going to hold them down no matter what. This partner of his has that unfailingly loyalty even if it was nurtured on an unsavory seed. She isn't thrilled about it. She doesn't think it's right, but Jesse is trying to reassure her. Her concern only deepens when he mentions they work for someone else. She's been in enough situations like these to know that there's a drug lord somewhere in this game. Jesse and his partner are the makers. Not the businessman.
It's a dangerous game he's in, but she knows he knows that too. He squeezes her hand, but she wiggles out of it so she can wrap her arms around him and hold him close.]
Thank you for telling me. I'm just-- a little worried about you. Like I know you know all the risks but still.
[ Jesse sighs, his eyes slipping shut as he leans into Alexis' embrace, his chin resting lightly on her shoulder. It feels good to feel cared about, even though he doesn't want her to worry.
He wants to reassure her more--tell her again that this is just a temporary arrangement; three months and he'll be a millionaire without a care in the world, so long as he keeps his head down and plays his cards right. He wants to let her know that it's way less dangerous than cooking out here and slinging on street corners had been, even if it means he and Mr. White have given up a lot of control in the process. It's still safer. There's less risk, for now. ]
Like I said. A few more months and I'm out. Won't ever have to do it again.
[ Jesse pulls back and cups her face, looking in her eyes. ]
Then maybe I can spoil you. Take you somewhere. To celebrate my newfound freedom.
[Yeah, he's being a dreamer and thinking big. It's only their second date, but Jesse's already thinking optimistically about the future and, even if it seems like too much too soon, he can't lie and say he doesn't hope his future means a future for them, too. ]
[She has no right to tell him what to do or how to handle his business. He's been in this since before she came into his life. Alexis knows that all she can do is be there for him and support him. He's not the first person she's cared about that she's helped out on precarious situations. She turns her head to brush her lips along his cheek when he settles his chin on her shoulder. She keeps him close.
A few more months, he says. He cups her face and looks at her so earnestly. He wants to spoil her and take her away. She smiles at him adoringly. The affection fills her heart so much, it feels like it's going to burst.]
What if I want to take you away somewhere nice? Come on an adventure with me. Even if it's just for the weekend.
I mean...I could probably clear it with my boss. Maybe. S'long as it all works out, yeah, I can go. Maybe just put in some overtime hours in the days before and I should be able to make quota ahead of time, which would give me a few days off.
[ Jesse formulates the plan out loud, then nods at the end, after going over everything in his head. Seems legit to him; he'd be telling his boss he has plans he wants to honor and at the same time he'd suggest he works some extra hours to make up for lost time. That way the shipment still goes out on time, all the work's done as ordered, and Walt and Jesse still get some time off. He's pretty sure Walt will bite at the chance, so Jesse nods. He nods and grins, face lighting up with his smile as he watches Alexis' face with eager eyes. ]
Yeah; I could totally pull it off. I mean, I'm yours if you wanna go someplace. Just say the words. 'Course, if you're planning stuff then I'm gonna insist you let me pay for the outings. Meals and whatnot, at least.
[ He leans into Alexis' hold, but can't help himself when he finds his lips tracing her pulse along the side of her neck. He mouths gently at the spot just beneath her earlobe once his mouth trails there. ]
[She gives a happy squeak when he says he could probably do it. She initially offers it just offhand because he's so focused on taking care of her when she doesn't really need it at all. Alexis appreciates it. His heart is in the right place. She doesn't want to overwhelm him, so she concedes to some of his conditions. Her nose playfully wrinkles.]
We'll split the costs. Planning is nothing.
[Her voice turns breathy and distracted at the feel of his lips. A soft sigh escapes her. She tilts her head for him to let him continue his track, but her hand reaches for him. Her fingers curl in his shirt to draw him closer. There's nothing more perfect than this moment with him under the stars.]
[ Jesse's definitely aware that Alexis is independent. At least from what he's learned of her so far, but that doesn't stop him from wanting to treat her to stuff and take care of her a little. Even if she doesn't need him to. Everyone deserves a little pampering from time to time. He lets out a playful sigh, running his hand up and down her back. ]
Okay, okay. We'll split it.
[ He can't help but smile against her skin as he feels her fingers curl into his shirt to pull him closer. He sighs a little against her neck, leaving another kiss behind on her soft skin. ]
I'm glad we could do this tonight, y'know?
[ For more reasons than just her, though spending time with her is definitely at the top of his list. It's nice for him to get a break from the monotony of work, too. Jesse pulls back to look into her eyes, brushing some hair out of her face. He glances briefly at her lips and then back up to her eyes, thinking about how he could kiss her all night and never get tired of it. ]
Me too. This is-- amazing. I thought our first date was good, but this feels so perfect.
[More than Alexis could say. Looking around, they're surrounded by stars and the dance of the firelight. It's so romantic that it fills her with fluttery butterflies. There's no one here but them, and it makes her feel like they're on top of the world. The soft kisses he presses against her skin make her feel breathless and needy.
She gently tilts his chin up, so she can steal a kiss. She takes her time with him because she feels like they have all the time in the world right now. They've talked about running away for a weekend, but out here, it feels like they've already done that.
Alexis sinks back into the blanket and draws him on top of her so they can both get comfortable. She sighs against his mouth and runs her tongue along his.]
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zvi
no subject
Date: 2022-09-28 03:25 pm (UTC)[She doesn't just sit around and look pretty. She starts cleaning up, fluttering about to help Jesse get everything ready for their s'mores. It's completely dark in the desert now save for their fire. The moon is bright, but only half full. It makes the stars twinkle even more all around it. She's buzzing a little from his soft kiss. She definitely wants more. She hasn't really been able to get him out of her head since their night together.
With the leftovers of the picnic basket tucked away in the fridge, the RV is left alone for now because the real party is by the fire pit. She wiggled in excitement as he gets all the goodies out. She spears a fluffy marshmallow with the stick and offers it to him before making another for herself. She roasts it over the fire and watched it slowly turn golden.]
I don't think I've ever had s'mores pop tarts. Are they any good?
no subject
Date: 2022-09-28 04:09 pm (UTC)[ Jesse smiles, but he means it even though it's said in a lighthearted tone. By the time he settles back by the fire, he finds himself getting a little lost looking up at the stars, like he does every time he's out here in the quiet and the dark. Most of the time he's out here by himself, save for the times he'd come out to work, but Alexis is the only person he's shown this place. He wants to let her into his life and share things that he doesn't share with anyone else. Eventually he'll be able to tell her more, but this at least lays the groundwork for that later conversation.
He takes the stick and holds it over the fire, trying to be careful not to ignite the marshmallow, even if he sometimes likes the charred ones. ]
Admittedly, I've only had 'em when I was super stoned so, like, they were really good but so is a lot of stuff when you're high. They weren't as good as the real thing, though.
[ He laughs and, distracted, ends up holding the marshmallow in one spot for too long. He does a double-take before realizing it's on fire. ]
Oh, shit!
[ Jesse pulls it from the flames and blows on it a few times until it's out. It's burnt, but only on the outside. He makes a s'more with it anyway, laughing at how easily he's distracted. ]
I guess gettin' em all golden brown is for people with a better attention span than mine.
no subject
Date: 2022-09-29 01:09 am (UTC)[She's happy for that. Jesse is so easygoing and laidback. She still marvels at how easily the conversation comes between them. Things just come out without needing much thought. She's slowly turning her marshmallow in the flame. She chuckles a little. She's been high on so many different things, and she's definitely been guilty of munching on a strawberry Pop-Tart during a time or two.]
I always wanted Doritos when I was high. I don't really like them in general, but I always craved them whenever it happened.
[She's not even all that particular on which flavor though she remembers getting the blue bag often. She startles a little when his marshmallow ignites. Her hands flutter helplessly as if she wants to help him but unsure how. She leans in to study it.]
Still looks good to me! If you want, you can have mine!
[She pulls out her gooey golden brown marshmallow and winks at him.]
no subject
Date: 2022-09-30 02:15 am (UTC)[ Jesse says suddenly, but then laughs at his reaction, leaning over to get a chunk of chocolate and some graham crackers to hold the whole thing together. ]
I mean, nah. I'm good with this charred mess I created. Sometimes the burnt bit adds flavor as long as it's not, like, totally obliterated.
[ Jesse smiles, because he's been there--burned marshmallows beyond the salvage point. It's happened enough times for him to laugh about it. ]
But yeah...you can tell me anything. I mean, I know it takes time to earn that kinda trust, but...I won't let you down.
[ His expression grows a little more serious, wanting to convey that he means it. He doesn't expect any crazy confessions or anything, especially only on the second date, but he wants to let her know that he's going to work on earning her trust. ]
no subject
Date: 2022-09-30 02:34 am (UTC)[She's giggling at his refusal. She reached for the chocolate and graham cracker too, so she can squish it all together in a delicious treat. It's hard to take a ladylike bite, so she just goes all in and hopes for the best. She has a smear of chocolate and marshmallow on her lips that she tries to lick up, a hand coming up to politely hide what a mess she is.]
I really like that about you. I feel like you just get me, you know? I really hope that I make you feel like that too.
[She gently bumps her shoulder against his and offers him a bite of her s'more. Alexis playfully steals a bite from his to get a taste of his charred creation.] I want you to know you can tell me anything too. I'm hard to freak out.
no subject
Date: 2022-09-30 03:30 am (UTC)You, uh...got a little something...
[ Jesse can't hold in his laugh, but he leans in to kiss her anyway, making a mess of them both. Luckily, he brought out a stack of napkins for them that he placed a rock on top of so they wouldn't blow away in case of wind. He wipes at his face and then offers Alexis a few napkins, too, a goofy grin stuck on that he couldn't quell if he tried. ]
Yeah, I feel like that too, for sure.
[ He thinks for a moment, taking a deep breath before he starts talking. ]
Okay, so um. The first time I came out here? It, uh. It wasn't to clear my head. The first time I came out here...I was out this way for um...drug manufacturing. Methamphetamine.
[ He rushes the next words, in an effort not to scare her off entirely with that first factoid. ]
I don't, like...I don't really smoke it anymore. Just, um. Sell it. Sometimes. I was kinda tryin' to get out of the game, actually...but this guy. My partner. He, uh. He blackmailed me into stayin' in and partnering up with him. He's kind of an asshole a lot of the time but like...he's sick. Lung cancer. I guess he needed a way to make some fast cash to, y'know, leave behind somethin' for his family before he bites the big one.
[ Jesse winces a little, not quite able to meet Alexis' eyes. It's a pretty huge confession, but he feels a weight lift off his shoulders when he admits it. She deserves to know a little of what she's getting into and if she wants nothing to do with him after this, well, he would understand even if he'd be heartbroken. ]
It doesn't feel right not tellin' you. I uh, I didn't wanna tell you when you were in a position where you couldn't just like, leave on your own if you wanted to but just like, say the words and I'll drive you back. No judgments, like I said...
no subject
Date: 2022-09-30 07:40 pm (UTC)The smile slowly fades as she becomes more solemn. She fees the shift in the air. Jesse has her full attention. Whatever he has to tell her, it's serious.
Her brows knit together as he explains what he's been caught up in. It's not her first time to be involved with a drug dealer, but likely the first with a drug manufacturer. She feels an indignation on his behalf. Cancer or not, his partner sounds like a huge dick.]
He's blackmailing you? Who does he think he is? [Her tone is affronted. She has a bone to pick with his partner. It's not even a thought in her mind to have Jesse take her home.]
no subject
Date: 2022-09-30 08:39 pm (UTC)I dunno. That's how he got me to agree to work with him at first but, like, I think it's different now. Honestly I probably wouldn't've helped him out otherwise. Guess he was just, like, desperate considering his health problems and all. We kinda....have an agreement goin' these days and, like, we work for someone else now.
[ Jesse doesn't know how much detail he can go into about that. Not because he doesn't trust Alexis, but because he worries about her knowing too much and if that would ever put her in any kind of danger. He'd never forgive himself if it did. ]
I'm not, like, planning to stay in the game much longer. He said, like, a few more months and we'll be set, so. I don't know. I know it's not the ideal situation but um...I felt like you deserve to know, so.
[ Jesse bites his lower lip and reaches out to take her hand, squeezing gently and looking into her eyes, trying to read her. ]
no subject
Date: 2022-09-30 11:23 pm (UTC)It's a dangerous game he's in, but she knows he knows that too. He squeezes her hand, but she wiggles out of it so she can wrap her arms around him and hold him close.]
Thank you for telling me. I'm just-- a little worried about you. Like I know you know all the risks but still.
no subject
Date: 2022-09-30 11:43 pm (UTC)[ Jesse sighs, his eyes slipping shut as he leans into Alexis' embrace, his chin resting lightly on her shoulder. It feels good to feel cared about, even though he doesn't want her to worry.
He wants to reassure her more--tell her again that this is just a temporary arrangement; three months and he'll be a millionaire without a care in the world, so long as he keeps his head down and plays his cards right. He wants to let her know that it's way less dangerous than cooking out here and slinging on street corners had been, even if it means he and Mr. White have given up a lot of control in the process. It's still safer. There's less risk, for now. ]
Like I said. A few more months and I'm out. Won't ever have to do it again.
[ Jesse pulls back and cups her face, looking in her eyes. ]
Then maybe I can spoil you. Take you somewhere. To celebrate my newfound freedom.
[Yeah, he's being a dreamer and thinking big. It's only their second date, but Jesse's already thinking optimistically about the future and, even if it seems like too much too soon, he can't lie and say he doesn't hope his future means a future for them, too. ]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-01 11:03 pm (UTC)[She has no right to tell him what to do or how to handle his business. He's been in this since before she came into his life. Alexis knows that all she can do is be there for him and support him. He's not the first person she's cared about that she's helped out on precarious situations. She turns her head to brush her lips along his cheek when he settles his chin on her shoulder. She keeps him close.
A few more months, he says. He cups her face and looks at her so earnestly. He wants to spoil her and take her away. She smiles at him adoringly. The affection fills her heart so much, it feels like it's going to burst.]
What if I want to take you away somewhere nice? Come on an adventure with me. Even if it's just for the weekend.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-11 04:23 am (UTC)[ Jesse formulates the plan out loud, then nods at the end, after going over everything in his head. Seems legit to him; he'd be telling his boss he has plans he wants to honor and at the same time he'd suggest he works some extra hours to make up for lost time. That way the shipment still goes out on time, all the work's done as ordered, and Walt and Jesse still get some time off. He's pretty sure Walt will bite at the chance, so Jesse nods. He nods and grins, face lighting up with his smile as he watches Alexis' face with eager eyes. ]
Yeah; I could totally pull it off. I mean, I'm yours if you wanna go someplace. Just say the words. 'Course, if you're planning stuff then I'm gonna insist you let me pay for the outings. Meals and whatnot, at least.
[ He leans into Alexis' hold, but can't help himself when he finds his lips tracing her pulse along the side of her neck. He mouths gently at the spot just beneath her earlobe once his mouth trails there. ]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-11 02:34 pm (UTC)We'll split the costs. Planning is nothing.
[Her voice turns breathy and distracted at the feel of his lips. A soft sigh escapes her. She tilts her head for him to let him continue his track, but her hand reaches for him. Her fingers curl in his shirt to draw him closer. There's nothing more perfect than this moment with him under the stars.]
Jesse.
no subject
Date: 2022-10-12 04:47 pm (UTC)Okay, okay. We'll split it.
[ He can't help but smile against her skin as he feels her fingers curl into his shirt to pull him closer. He sighs a little against her neck, leaving another kiss behind on her soft skin. ]
I'm glad we could do this tonight, y'know?
[ For more reasons than just her, though spending time with her is definitely at the top of his list. It's nice for him to get a break from the monotony of work, too. Jesse pulls back to look into her eyes, brushing some hair out of her face. He glances briefly at her lips and then back up to her eyes, thinking about how he could kiss her all night and never get tired of it. ]
no subject
Date: 2022-10-13 12:08 am (UTC)[More than Alexis could say. Looking around, they're surrounded by stars and the dance of the firelight. It's so romantic that it fills her with fluttery butterflies. There's no one here but them, and it makes her feel like they're on top of the world. The soft kisses he presses against her skin make her feel breathless and needy.
She gently tilts his chin up, so she can steal a kiss. She takes her time with him because she feels like they have all the time in the world right now. They've talked about running away for a weekend, but out here, it feels like they've already done that.
Alexis sinks back into the blanket and draws him on top of her so they can both get comfortable. She sighs against his mouth and runs her tongue along his.]